Paternity Leave Roundup

We're down to the last few days of Brandon's paternity leave, so I thought I should write up a quick blog post before next week when I'm home full time with two small children and will probably not get a chance to blog again until Lincoln's first birthday.

We've had a fine time together these past weeks, minus the first two when we were dealing with birth recovery, illness, and hospitalizations. I like the routine we've had and it's going to hard to lose that as we find a new normal.


The Things I'm going to miss most about Paternity Leave:

1. Sleep. Since I am nursing, I get up with the baby at night and then Brandon has been getting up with Lucas in the morning and at naptime, allowing me to snag a couple extra hours of sleep during the day. The boys occasionally nap at the same time but it's by no means a sure thing, so it's likely that most days I won't be able to sleep at all other than whatever I get between the hours of 8pm and 6am.

2. Meal preparation: Brandon has been handling the majority of cooking and meal prep while he'e been home. It's going to be a lot of "handful of trail mix for lunch, frozen Trader Joe's meal for dinner" over the next few weeks, I think.

3. Help with housework: Neither of us are amazing housekeepers, but I suspect the cleanliness around here is going to take a nose dive as well.

4. Help getting out of the house: Getting both boys dressed and ready to leave the house in the morning is ridiculously more complicated than doing it with one. Hope Lucas enjoys playing in our backyard for a while! Don't even get me started on how much I am dreading dragging both boys with me on errands to the grocery store, post office, etc.


Here are a few photos of the fun things we've been up to in the past month or so!

Love this little face.

Fun with trucks at the pumpkin patch!

Just riding in my tractor.

I choose this pumpkin!

Lots of this happening, for him at least if not the rest of us.

Lots of this happening too.

My one month old, chunking up nicely.

Aww, brothers!

The First Two Weeks

We expected that the first two weeks at home with both the boys would be difficult, but it turned out to be even worse than we anticipated, and for a totally unexpected reason. Hand foot and mouth disease finally found its way into our house.

On the Tuesday after we came home from the hospital, Lucas started acting out much worse than we're used to. Lots of tantrums and general irritability, but since it coincided with Lincoln's arrival into our house, we all chalked it up to sibling adjustment and tried to ignore it. I felt like such a jerk of a mother when after two days of cranky Lucas, I finally made the connection with HFM that he was sick on Wednesday night when he spit out a bite of banana (his favorite food) while crying and saying "ow."

Anyone who tries to tell me that HFM is just a mild childhood illness is liable to get kicked in the teeth, because this was the worst sickness we've ever had to deal with from Lucas in his lifetime, and that includes RSV and croup. The problem was that his mouth sores caused him a lot of pain when eating or drinking, so he simply refused to eat or drink much of anything for the next four days. If you know Lucas, you know that he is King of the Hanger Tantrum, which is why I take such care to keep him fed with plenty of protein and nutrient-dense foods throughout the day. Since he wasn't eating anything, we basically had to deal with a hangry, irritable Lucas for 12 hours a day until he finally started feeling well enough to eat again. Combine this with me still in recovery from giving birth, and the constant needs of newborn care, and it was basically the worst week of all time.

We tried our best to keep the boys separated, and wash our hands whenever we switched between them, but I began to notice a marked increase in lethargy in Lincoln around Monday, just as Lucas started getting better. On Tuesday afternoon, I took his temperature - 100.4. Very low-grade fever, but with infants as young as Lincoln, you really can't take any chances so his doctor advised that we take him into the emergency room to get checked out. I was 95% certain that he had simply caught HFM from his brother (he had one visible sore inside his lip), but dutifully brought him in anyway.

Upon arrival at the Rady Children's Hospital ER, I was promptly informed that for a baby under one month, any fever meant that he needed to have a full septic work up to rule out any serious infections. This meant 48 hours of testing and hospital admission for my tiny sweet boy, including a urine catheter, blood draw, spinal tap, and two days of precautionary IV antibiotics. He was so sweet and brave during the tests, the nurses and doctors were very impressed by how calmly he took everything. I had to handle the majority of the ER and hospital stay on my own, since Brandon was stuck at home caring for Lucas. I think I held it together pretty well for someone only 10 days postpartum!

We spent the first evening in the ER, which was the worst of it because this was the only time he actually seemed sick and I had to watch him get stuck all over with needles while surrounded by screaming children in pain. Once we transferred to the pediatrics unit at a hospital nearer to home (Lincoln via ambulance, with me following close behind in the car) and were admitted to a private room for the remainder of our stay, things were a lot calmer and easier to handle. Lincoln's fever was gone by the next morning, but we were asked to stay for the full 48 hours until the tests could confirm that there was no bacterial infection and we were just dealing with a run of the mill virus.

Not feeling too good in the ER.

I started calling him Little Lionheart for being so brave during all his tests, mostly inspired by this hat.

The doctor also noted that his illness had exacerbated his mild jaundice, and prescribed him some time under the bilirubin lights to "de-yellow-fy" him a bit since we were stuck in the hospital anyway. The lights convert the bilirubin in his system into something that can come out in his poop, which I found pretty fascinating although also gross. It was amazing to see how quickly he turned pink after spending a day or so under the lights.

Spa treatment under the bilirubin lights.

His spinal tap confirmed the presence of enterovirus toward the end of our first full day in the hospital, which was actually very comforting because it meant it was almost certainly not a more serious bacterial infection. By that time he was much more alert and feeding better and for longer periods of time, so the hospital stay was more boring than anything else. I think Brandon had a much harder time caring for Lucas for two straight days alone than I had lounging in our private room on my bed, having meals brought to me and reading my book in peace for hours on end.

Chilling in our room, getting better every minute.

Still, I was ecstatic when Lincoln was discharged in the late afternoon on our second day in the hospital, and it was amazing to be back home with the whole family again. Lucas in particular was very glad to have me back, and Brandon, best husband in the world, greeted me at the door with an open bottle of red wine.

Ready to go home!

Little smirk - happy to be home again.

Brandon and I have remarked to each other in the days since Lincoln got home from the hospital that taking care of two healthy kids frankly seems like a breeze in comparison to taking care of sick ones. Hopefully we'll all remain that way for a good long time!

Lincoln's Birth Story

Because of Lucas's weight at birth, my doctor had been discussing the possibility of induction early on in this pregnancy. Although I did have a successful vaginal birth with Lucas, having had to push for four hours and end with an episiotomy and vacuum assist made me eager and willing to take steps to ensure a smaller baby and easier birth experience this time around. After my 36 week growth ultrasound indicated that the Kraken was already hovering around nine pounds, we went ahead and scheduled an induction for the beginning of my 39th week.

My body began showing signs of being ready for labor several weeks before my due date, and by three days before my induction, I was 4cm dilated, 80% effaced, and had already lost my mucus plug. My doctor offered to strip my membranes at my final regular appointment prior to the induction, on the off chance that I could go into labor naturally and we could avoid the artificial induction. My mom had flown in several days earlier so we could be sure we had childcare in place for Lucas during my labor and delivery, so I was happy to try anything that could get labor going on its own. Following the appointment, I felt crampy and "off" for the rest of the day, and had some bloody show in the afternoon and evening. I tried not to get my hopes up, but felt there was a good chance I was about to go into labor.

Around midnight on October 4, I woke up and felt a few mild contractions. After an hour so, I started timing them and woke Brandon up to let him know that labor had begun. Contractions were around 5 minutes apart for an hour, and we decided to head to the hospital because I was already so dilated that I was worried labor might progress more quickly than I was prepared for. I was anxious to get admitted and have my epidural placed before things got real. As it turned out, I did not need to worry about things going too quickly!

Once we arrived at triage, they checked me and monitored my contractions for 20 minutes or so. I was 4.5cm dilated, but my contractions had slowed to around 6 minutes apart, so my doctor requested that we walk for two hours and get rechecked before she decided whether or not to admit me. Those next two hours were the most difficult part of my labor experience. Contractions remained between 4-5 minutes apart, although they got stronger over the course of those two hours. I was very worried that we'd be sent home, especially since the final few contractions before we went to get rechecked were 5-8 minutes apart. The recheck revealed that I'd progressed to 5.5 cm in those two hours, and the doctor agreed to admit me.

Oddly enough, right after I was admitted and settled into my labor and delivery room, my contractions basically stalled out completely and slowed down to mild contractions every 10-15 minutes. I didn't request my epidural yet because I wasn't in any pain. We hung out in the room for 3-4 hours, and I bounced on a birthing ball, drank juice, listened to music, watched some sitcom reruns on TV, and chatted with my L&D nurse. Brandon even left for a little while to eat breakfast. Eventually, I met with the doctor on call, who was not from my usual practice but who I liked immediately, and we agreed that I'd get my epidural placed and then she'd come back and break my water to get labor moving again.

Hooray for epidurals! I had just as great an experience with this one as I had with the first. The final cervix check before the doctor broke my water revealed that I'd progressed to 7cm, even with the mild, irregular contractions I'd been having. I'd been in labor for about ten and a half hours at this point. Breaking my water definitely got things going again, and after two hours of strong, regular contractions (that I merely felt as slight increases in pressure thanks to my blessed and glorious epidural), dilation was complete and I felt pressure encouraging me to start pushing.

I was extremely nervous and anxious about pushing after my four-hour experience with Lucas, but my nurse assured me that a second baby would not be the same experience. She told me we'd have this baby out in three contractions worth of pushes. Brandon and I both kind of rolled our eyes at that.  But after two contractions of three pushes apiece, she told me I'd have to breathe through the next contraction and wait for the doctor to gown up and get into the room, because after the next contraction, I was going to have my new baby.

The doctor arrived, we all got ready, and sure enough, four pushes later and Lincoln Michael was born after just under twelve hours of labor and twenty minutes of pushing. He got 9/9 on his Apgars and weighed in at 9 lbs 4 oz and 20.25 inches long. We were shocked at how "small" he was, even though he was born at 38 weeks 6 days, but I can't say I was too disappointed given my easy, breezy labor and delivery experience.

Lincoln Michael's name is from my great-grandfather Charles Lincoln, and his middle name is after my dad. We love the name itself and also the symmetry of it, since Lucas Alan is named for Brandon's great-grandfather and dad.

We stayed at the hospital for another 24 hours and were excited to get home as soon as we could. Lincoln has been a dream so far and we're so happy to be a family of four.

Last photo before Lincoln's birth

So happy to meet my Littlest even if he's covered in gook

Our little peanut

Proud new dada

Big Brother gives the baby a kiss

Our Littlest Lincoln

Lucas the Artist

I haven't updated recently because it's all been very much the same (fun) things all summer: park, zoo, gym, pool, splash pad, rinse and repeat. I've been loving my final summer as a mom of one and Lucas has been, frankly, a lot easier to deal with as a two-year-old than he was as a pre-verbal one-year-old. He definitely gets the majority of his time-outs for defiance and refusing to listen/follow directions, but he does very well overall and is a joy to spend time with.

One funny thing he started doing this summer was creating installation art pieces using his truck collection. He'd very carefully line up or position a certain number of cars, then declare "Ta-Da!" once it was complete and step back for Brandon or I to admire it. I started taking photos of some of his "work" to preserve them for posterity's sake, since his pieces are transient in nature and rarely remain on display for more than an hour before being dismantled.

These art pieces may look merely like randomized mess, but I assure you that they were deliberately made and constructed. Just to be clear, my tongue is firmly in cheek here! I hope you enjoy Lucas's early artistic endeavors in the spirit they are presented.

The Artist at work.

Cars and Trucks on Rug #1, a multimedia piece by Lucas T.

Cars and Trucks in Line #1, a multimedia piece by Lucas T.

Cars and Trucks on Rug #2, a multimedia piece by Lucas T.

Cars and Trucks on Tray #1, a multimedia piece by Lucas T.

The Artist at work creating the previous piece

Branching out in materials: Puffballs on Carpet #1 by Lucas T.

Weekend with the Grandparents

Lucas's Baba and Amma (his names for my parents) came to town this past weekend! We had a blast hanging out; he loves having double the audience to show off for and Brandon and I enjoy having a little respite from the Hurricane. Plus, I have tons of adorable photos to show off!

The plan was to present Lucas with his first Brio train set as a "Congratulations! You're a big brother!" gift closer to the release of The Kraken, but Baba and Amma were too excited so he got it this weekend instead. Needless to say, the "choo track" was a huge hit and a good portion of the weekend was spent playing with it. His favorite part is the tunnel that makes noises as the train cars go through it.

On Friday morning, we dressed Lucas up in an adorable Frodo Baggins costume put together/sewn by Amma and headed downtown to the convention center to people watch at Comic Con. When we could convince Lucas to wear his cloak, everyone immediately recognized him and he got a lot of attention, which he of course loved. I think his favorite part was riding the trolley there and back again, though. 

After circling around the convention center and taking in the sights for a while, we made our way down to the nearby tourist trap shopping center, where they have an old wooden carousel, Lucas's favorite thing ever. Then after lunch, we took the trolley back home. This was a bit more exciting than anticipated, as the trolley hit a car partway there, delaying us significantly and leading to a "Mom pushed nap time too late" hysterical meltdown in the trolley car by the Hurricane. I eventually managed to get him to fall asleep on my shoulder, and all was well. 

Even the smallest person can change the course of the future

 The rest of the weekend was more relaxed and toddler-centric. We all took him swimming at the YMCA on Saturday morning, and had a great time grilling dinner and hanging out in the backyard on Saturday afternoon and evening. Weekends like this always make me wish we had family in town! Luckily, Amma and Baba will be back soon for another visit in early September.

Lucas's New Room

We planned from the beginning to move Lucas over to his new room as soon as possible before The Kraken was born so he'd have lots of time to adjust to a toddler bed and new space, and so it wouldn't seem as much like he'd been kicked out of his room to make space for the baby.

The theme was obviously going to be vehicles of some kind, and ended up being mostly construction trucks. Lucas has been sleeping in the new room for the past three nights and it's been going very well. Last night was the first time he put himself to sleep alone in his room, and today he even fell asleep on his own for nap time, which is highly unusual for him! I'm glad we'll have plenty of time for this to become the new normal before the baby arrives in October.

Without further ado, here is the new room!

The prints on the wall are actually a decal set I purchased on Amazon, set into some super cheap frames from IKEA. I stole the idea from our church's children's ministry. It's great and toddler-friendly because the frames are completely plastic. Lucas loved the decals and likes to point out which ones are the dump, digger, or mixer. Rumor has it that a train set will soon be coming from his Amma and Baba that will take up residence on the coffee table under the window. The blackout curtains on the window are very necessary since this side of the house gets a lot of sun in the afternoon. They've worked well, although his room is still the warmest in the house. 

We'll be using these Target storage cubes as a makeshift dresser for a little while until we're able to get a proper dresser to fit into his closet sometime in the next six months. He'll also share space in the large dresser in the nursery. Once he has his own dresser, we'll use the storage boxes for toys, shoes, and other miscellaneous items.

The bottom three shelves of the bookshelf are specifically Lucas's books, plus a few toys. The top three shelves are my children's and YA literature collection, books that I hope he might read as he gets older. I've got Charlotte's Web and Harry Potter at the ready as soon as he can handle them! I also have one more decoration with his name to have framed that will be hung over the bed soon.

I was particularly excited to get this road play rug for his room. He really enjoys "rooming" his cars all over it. 

Bonus picture of the Biggest Boy out on a walk today. He kept requesting that we play with "More dirt!" What a boy.

Books for May and June

I confess that I forgot about these a little bit with all the summer fun we've been having around here. I'm still plugging along at a steady three books per month pace, though!

13. Prodigy by Marie Lu: The sequel to last month's Legend, I enjoyed this one about as much as the first, I'm sorry to say. Something about the plot lines just doesn't really grab me for some reason and I am the opposite of invested in the main romance. I may pick up the third one down the road if I find myself at a loss for what to read next, but I'm not chomping at the bit to see how it all ends by any means.

14. The Fault in Our Stars by John Green: I picked this up on a whim on my way out of the library one day after having seen the movie trailer a million times that week on television. I assumed it would be exhausting teenage romantic angst, and in some ways it was. But I'll fully admit that I really enjoyed this one also. I can never quite get invested in teen romance as True Love but the relationship between Hazel and Gus was sufficiently adorable and tragic. More than the romance part of the plot, I appreciated the roles that the parents played in the book (as I put myself more in the parents' shoes these days than the teenagers) and the look into the daily realities of living with a terminal cancer diagnosis. One idea that has stuck with me in particular is the idea that a life doesn't have to be Big and Meaningful to be important. Lives lived small and quietly are just as significant, even if only a few people are likely to remember you once you're gone. I have many thoughts on this idea, but I'll leave it there for now.

15. From Scratch: Inside the Food Network by Allen Salkin: Brandon and I love watching the Food Network, so I read this in hopes of getting some good dirt on our favorite celebrity chefs. Sadly, about half this book was taken up with droning on about market shares and the technical aspects of developing and marketing a television network. Total snoozer. The parts that did contain the dirt were quite enjoyable, however, so the book wasn't a total loss.

16. Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Kurcinka: My mom picked this one up for me after a particularly trying day of tantrums from Lucas. I found it very enlightening in giving me insight into my child's personality, who fit almost every single aspect of the "spirited child' as described in the book. I really appreciated the new framing and vocabulary the book provided me with to describe my child as opposed to calling him "strong willed" or "bratty." Understanding the motivations behind Lucas's overwhelmed tantrums (as opposed to his defiance tantrums) has really helped me in avoiding them and minimizing them when they do occur. This was a lifesaver in Florida, where he was overwhelmed for a good portion of every day. This is definitely one I'll keep to refer to again as Lucas gets older.

17. Wool by Hugh Howey: Goodness gracious, it took me such a long time to get through this book! I started it in mid-April and it took me almost two months to finish because I kept stopping to read other books in between. It wasn't that this book wasn't well-written and interesting, because it definitely was. The problem was that I found the post-apocalyptic setting to be so unrelentingly bleak that I could only read so much of it before I had to take a break. The concept was fascinating and the characters very well-developed, but despite that I don't think I'll be picking up the next two books in the trilogy any time soon. Life is too short for a book to be this depressing.

18. Fortune's Fool by Mercedes Lackey: This paperback came into my possession via Paperback Swap. This website is great in theory: you ship your unwanted paperbacks to other users who request them, and in turn earn credits so people will ship paperbacks that you want to read back to you. The problem is that none of the books I really want to read are ever available for swapping, and having to go to the post office (my least favorite errand of all time) all the time and pay to mail people my unwanted books was exhausting and ultimately not worth it. I still have a few credits left as well as a wish list, and occasionally books still get sent my way. Anyway, this book was terrible. Lackey is an author whose early works I really enjoyed as a teenager, but I'm afraid anything she's written in the last decade has been completely phoned in. I think it's time for me to break up with her as an author and move on.

There is the list for now! This month I've been rereading a couple old favorites in anticipation of a new book being released next week, so next month's list will be pretty one-note as it will likely include only a single trilogy.